Personal essays
Facing a fear
People
I am afraid of guns.
More accurately, I’m afraid of the number of guns that are around me in the hands of people who may misuse them.
Given that, it might surprise you to know that I spent Saturday at a CCW (Concealed Carry Weapon) class.
The senior instructor almost lost me in the beginning when he said there were three kinds of people: Those who are over zealous gun owners, those who are afraid of guns and think no one should own them, and those who know that guns don’t kill people - people kill people.
I know that people kill people and they can do so without guns. We saw the Tyre Nichols case where an innocent man was beaten to death by five police officers. We saw the George Floyd and Eric Garner cases where innocent men was choked to death by trained officers.
Guns take the risk of innocent people getting hurt to a whole new level.
So yes, people kill people. But I’m still afraid of guns. People with guns kill more people.
Here’s the thing about the class I took. We learned about guns. We learned to load, handle, and fire guns. We ended the day at a shooting range shooting at targets. But most of the day we learned about gun safety and the law.
Throughout the day, the senior instructor would stop and remind us that there’s a lot to carrying a gun.
Despite that, Ohio has recently decided that you can carry a concealed weapon without taking a class - you have the constitutional right to carry a gun.
The people who don’t think they need or want a class are the people I don’t want to carry a gun.
It’s loaded
There are four basic rules of gun safety. The first is that you should treat any gun as if it is loaded.
The moment either instructor put their hand on a gun they checked to make sure it wasn’t.
The instructors invited attendees who owned guns to bring them into the classroom as long as they left their ammunition somewhere else.
The first thing the instructors did with each gun brought into the classroom was check to make sure they weren’t loaded.
More than that, each time they picked up a gun, even if they’d handled it before, they checked to make sure it wasn’t loaded.
Think of all of the tragedies that could be avoided if this simple rule was universally followed.
It’s dangerous
Suppose the gun is loaded. The second rule reminds us that you should never point the gun at anything you are not willing to kill or destroy.
Later in the day we got into the legalities of when you can fire at someone.
The rule is essentially that you can fire at someone to protect against them using deadly force against you or someone else.
If someone breaks into your house and is robbing you, you can’t use your gun to protect your stuff.
If you are out somewhere and someone is threatening you with deadly force and you can retreat, then you have to retreat.
If you are the aggressor, then you can’t escalate the situation to where you use your gun.
There’s a lot to owning a gun.
What’s behind
I’ve only gone to a shooting range once before. Friends took me to a shooting range in San Jose. I remember when it wasn’t my turn, standing and watching them shoot.
I watched them. I watched the target. And then I got fascinated with looking beyond the target. The bullet went through the target like it was nothing and kept going until it hit a big pile quite a ways beyond the target.
That’s a big part of my fear of guns.
Guns are used in stress-filled situations. They’re used when the adrenalin is pumping. People’s aim isn’t good under calm situations facing a target.
Remember, you only shoot if you intend to kill or destroy. You can only shoot if you are facing deadly force.
In that situation your aim is probably not the best.
I think of all of the people who are behind the target and maybe off to the side one way or another.
That, by the way, is the third rule of gun safety: know your target and what is beyond it.
The Trigger
The final rule of gun safety is that you should keep your finger off of the trigger until your sights are on the target and you’ve made a conscious decision to shoot.
There’s a lot to owning a gun.
We spent quite a bit of time learning to pick up a gun safely, seat it into our dominant hand with our index finger pointing along the barrel. Our finger didn’t move to the trigger until we were ready to shoot.
At the range, the senior instructor stood behind me and gave commands. He told me when to load the gun and with how many rounds. He told me when to pick up the weapon and aim it and he told me how many shots to fire.
He tested me. He told me to fire two shots when there was only one bullet left and expected me to tell him that before I continued.
Any shot where I was outside of the center of the target he asked me what happened so I could analyze what part of his instructions on how to shoot I’d ignored.
I’m glad I took the class but I left almost more concerned than when I walked in.
The people I’m worried about aren’t going to take that class. The people I’m worried about will spend more time making sure they look good with their guns for their family Christmas card.
My father-in-law was a police officer and Kim remembers him coming into the house and locking his gun in one safe and his ammo in a separate safe.
I don’t know if I’ll use the class certificate to apply for a concealed carry license in Ohio. I’m not planning on owning a gun.
There’s a lot to it and I’m not sure I’m up to it.
Essay from Dim Sum Thinking Newsletter 149. Read the rest of the Newsletter or subscribe